The Apologetics of Being Trans

As a student I was a member of a bible study group. I know that I've talked before about the mixed feelings I've been left with from those days but I am grateful for the community they gave me as a lonely student.

We had some great times together and shared humour and food and care, and I suppose I'm typing that out to remind myself of the positive impact that time had for me as well as the difficulties it brought.

One of the things we used to talk about though was a particular bible verse from 1 Peter 3:15.

but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect.

As geeky students, we were absolutely into understanding and being able to justify our beliefs. We worked hard to be able to explain the deep mysteries and contradictions that was part of our faith.

This verse is the basis of a branch of christian theology called apologetics, which comes from the greek apologia meaning defence. Literally it is the defence of your faith. Be ready at any and all times to defend why you believe in God.

That's an ethos that has stuck with me. I'm a nightmare with medical students. Why does that drug make your asthma worse? Why do you think this is the correct course of treatment? I've always cared less about the actual answer and more about the thought process behind it.

As part of trying to understand my nature as a trans woman it's been important to me on a personal level to understand the biological basis of gender identity and it's been very helpful to my self acceptance. I'm a geek and I've also learned to accept that!

However one of the things I've noticed in giving up cisgender privilege is just how much people expect me to be able to give an answer to any question on trans issues and have a well thought out and formed position. I don't remember ever being asked previously why I chose to dress the way I did and if I wear something slightly different having to justify my gender identity as valid. I don't remember ever having to talk about the processing of prisoners in the criminal justice system or my participation in sport. I just did things that I wanted and as society expected me too.

However since coming out I spend a lot of time justifying and explaining to people why their systems or processes should include me.

Don't get me wrong I'm a geek I love knowledge but every time I meet someone new I can pretty much guarantee there'll be a series of topics where I am expected to provide succinct well thoughts out explanations merely because I'm a trans person, rather than because I'm a subject matter expert.

I was thinking what are the things that I've had to learn about in order to answer peoples questions and justify why I as a trans person deserved to be tolerated and respected just as much as they are and I've created a list!

What is sex?
what is gender expression?
what is gender identity?
what are gender roles?
What is gender non-conforming?
What is the biological basis of gender identity?
What is the historical medical classification of gender identity and why has it changed?
The history of UK equality law including Corbett V Corbett, relevant European Court of Human Rights Rulings, The sex discrimination act (gender reassignment 1999), the equality act 2010, The Equality and Human rights commission.
Current UK Equality law and relevant rulings including on protected beliefs
What changes as someone transition, biologically and physiologically and does this constitute changing sex
What are non-binary identities
UK census data on gender identity and it's methodology
The gender recognition act (2004) and it's suggested updates
The UK criminal justice system including processing of prisoners and trans prisoners
The disclosure and barring service and it's management of trans people
The history of segregation by sex in sport
The differences between men and women in sport
The differences between trans people and cisgender people in sport
The US collegiate swimming system
The processing of information around my identity and why it's important to allow the dignity and privacy of trans people
Be informed of every trans person who's done something bad ever

That's just off the top of my head. I can give you a coherent answer to all of these things and I hope I'd do them with compassion and grace and patient but also it's exhausting!

I guess it's part of my life now but it's a reflection of the extra mental load that I know carry simply because I'm trans. I imagine it's the same for other minorities and of course it comes from a place of interest and curiosity, and I personally don't mind but I think we all need to reflect a little on what responsibility we have to educate ourselves about things we don't understand rather than expecting people who just happen to have a characteristic you're interested in to do it for you.

That being said I'm a geek so ask me anything! Just don't assume that's the same for all trans people

However if you want to know more about being trans then there are several books I would recommend;

'Trans Like Me' by CN Lester they write eloquently and accessibly about trans issues along with their own experience (https://www.queerlit.co.uk/products/trans-like-me?_pos=1&_sid=743ed174b&_ss=r)

'All the things they said we couldn't have: stories of trans joy' by Tash Oakes-Monger Honestly this book broke my heart. The joy tinged with the overcoming of distress and pain hit home so hard. It's beautiful and captures the experience of trans joy wonderfully (https://www.queerlit.co.uk/products/all-the-things-they-said-we-couldnt-have?_pos=1&_sid=088e5fe94&_ss=r)

The Transgender Issue: An Argument for Justice by Shon Faye This book takes on the 'issues' that have formed the 'debate' in the media but actually presents discussions from actually trans people rather than the one sided nonsense that is our current media (https://www.queerlit.co.uk/products/the-transgender-issue?_pos=1&_sid=0389c3f1f&_ss=r)

Anyway let me know what you think!